Looking Back at Jaxx: The Grapes I Didn't Know About

Since losing Jaxx, I have spent a lot of time trying to understand what happened to her.

I have researched kidney disease. I have talked with our veterinarians. I have looked back at her symptoms, her bloodwork, her illnesses and everything I could remember about the years we had with her.

I thought I had considered every possibility.

Then, in July 2026, I learned something I had never known before.

There were grapes in my in-laws' yard.

And suddenly, I found myself looking back at Jaxx's story in a completely different way.

The grapes

I had no idea about the grapes while Jaxx was alive.

I didn't know there were grape vines in the yard or that she may have had access to them.

Jaxx spent time at my in-laws' property from when she was a puppy through the fall of 2024. That means there was a possibility that, at some point during those years, she could have gotten into grapes.

But I have to be very clear:

I don't know if she ever ate them.

I don't know if she ate one grape or several.

I don't know if she ever ate any at all.

And I didn't know about the grapes when we were trying to figure out why she was sick.

I only learned about them in July 2026 — months after Jaxx had passed.

That's what makes this so difficult.

Because now I can't help but wonder.

Could the grapes have been part of the story?

By the time I learned about the grapes, I already knew that grapes can be dangerous for dogs.

Grape and raisin ingestion can cause acute kidney injury in some dogs, and the reaction can be unpredictable.

So naturally, my mind went back to Jaxx.

She eventually developed kidney failure.

Could she have eaten grapes when she was younger?

Could an exposure have happened sometime between puppyhood and the fall of 2024?

Could it have contributed to kidney damage?

I don't know.

And I don't want to tell Jaxx's story as though I know something that I don't.

There is no way for me to prove that Jaxx ever ate those grapes, and there is no way for me to prove that grapes caused her kidney failure.

In fact, an exposure years earlier would not automatically explain chronic kidney failure later. Grape toxicity is generally associated with acute kidney injury after ingestion, so I cannot make a medical connection that I simply don't have evidence for.

But I can wonder.

And I do.

Then there was leptospirosis

There is another important piece of Jaxx's story.

In the winter of 2025, Jaxx was exposed to leptospirosis, even though she was vaccinated. 

This was something we knew about while she was alive and while we were dealing with her declining health.

Leptospirosis can cause significant kidney injury in dogs.

Knowing that Jaxx had been exposed to leptospirosis makes her kidney story even more complicated.

I have wondered whether her kidneys were already vulnerable for some reason and whether the leptospirosis exposure caused additional kidney injury or pushed an already struggling system further into failure.

Again, I can't say that is what happened.

I simply don't know.

What I do know is that when I look back now, there are several pieces to her story that make me wonder about what her kidneys had been through.

Looking back with information I didn't have

This is the hardest part.

When Jaxx was sick, I was doing everything I could with the information I had.

I talked to our vets.

I researched kidney failure.

I looked into nutrition.

I learned about medications and bloodwork and all the things I could do to help her.

I was trying to understand what was happening to my dog.

But I didn't know about the grapes.

That information didn't come to me until July 2026.

So I can't go back and say, Why didn't I do something?

Because I didn't know.

And I don't want another dog owner to feel that way either.

We can't know everything.

We learn as we go.

Sometimes we only discover pieces of the puzzle after the picture is already finished.

What I wish I had known

If your dog spends time somewhere with grape vines, make sure everyone knows that grapes can be dangerous to dogs.

Don't assume that because your dog has eaten something before without a problem that it is safe.

And if you ever suspect your dog has eaten grapes or raisins, contact your veterinarian promptly rather than waiting to see what happens.

Leptospirosis is another reminder that kidney problems can have complicated causes and that infections can cause serious kidney injury.

I wish I had known more.

But most of all, I wish I had known about the grapes while Jaxx was still here.

Maybe it would have changed nothing.

Maybe she never ate them.

Maybe her kidney failure had nothing to do with them.

Or maybe they were one small piece of a much bigger story.

I will never know.

Jaxx's legacy

I don't want Jaxx's story to become a story about guilt.

It isn't.

I loved her.

I advocated for her.

I learned everything I could when she became sick.

And I did the best I could with what I knew at the time.

Finding out about the grapes has simply left me with another question I wish I could ask her.

Did you ever eat those grapes, Jaxx?

I'll never get an answer.

But her story has already changed me.

Her illness led me to learn more about veterinary medicine, kidney disease and animal health than I ever expected to know. It ultimately helped lead me to enroll in a veterinary assistant course because I wanted to understand more and become a better advocate for the animals I love.

So even now, Jaxx is still teaching me.

Maybe I will never know what caused her kidney failure.

Maybe there wasn't one single cause.

Maybe it was a combination of things we never fully understood.

But I can share what I know now.

I can encourage other dog owners to learn about grape toxicity.

I can talk about leptospirosis and kidney disease.

And I can remind people that sometimes the most important thing we can do for our animals is simply to pay attention, ask questions and trust our instincts when something doesn't seem right.

I found out about the grapes too late 

But maybe sharing her story will help another dog.

And if that happens, then Jaxx's story will continue to make a difference.

I will always wonder about the grapes.

But more than anything, I will always remember my girl.

Jaxx. ❤️